Its perfect weather for the cocooning I am doing — holed away putting my Certified Visual Coaches from 2011 through their final exit exams. Part of which is listening to them coach a client and review their visual map of the session.

I can’t tell you how much joy it brings me to witness the high quality work that they are doing.  Such integrity, skill and passion.  And they add innovations too, things I haven’t thought of doing with new twists to my processes.  I am SO EXCITED about the Visual Coach Community that is building and the ripple effect we have globally. Makes my social change heart warm!

Talking about hearts (how is that for a segue eh!), with Valentine’s Day just passed and certain friends and clients hitting up against some common relationship challenges, I’ve decided to write this issue’s article on space and closeness dynamics in relationships … a good area to get a SHIFT in when you need it!

Yours in Visual Expansion and SHIFTing IT,

Christina Merkley,
The SHIFT-IT Coach
and Interactive-Visuals Mentor

A Note From Christina is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

“My connection with visual thinking and tools started years ago with Mindmapping.

In 2009, I came across your website and that was it! I started with The SHIFT-IT Home Retreat Kit. Was impressed with its quality and the results that unfolded after using it.

I then enrolled in Fundamentals of Interactive-Visuals online (very comprehensive and full of great resources, from drawing to business choices. And it was fun too!) From there I joined The SHIFT-IT Online Group (supportive and respectful with people from all around the world – wonderful)

I then committed myself to Visual Coach Certification®. Again a group with a high level of competence and humanity. Very well organized and professional. Even more than what I was expecting. I experienced the pleasure of my clients discovering and unfolding their visions like I did. Now I am a Certified Visual Coach® in the middle of creating my new business and it feels great!

Thank you Christina, because when you say “pick my brain”, it is true: you really share your knowledge, skills, experience and tools with a huge generosity.

I trusted that you were the right person for this step of my life and I was right!”

Sylvie Kwayeb Fagon
Certified Visual Coach®
Plouezoc’h France
s.kwayeb.fagon@gmail.com

In Your Words is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

As we are hot on the heels of Valentine’s Day … I thought a coaching article on relationships makes sense.

My primary area of coaching is not relationships (I mostly coach clients on creating authentic work and right livelihood, particularly via creative or unique means … and the various issues connected to doing that). But sometimes ‘relationship’ does pop up, and there are some common things that I see.

A COMMON POLARITY:
As a coach, when “Relationship” shows up as a topic of interest for my clients, it is usually when some sort of dissatisfaction has kicked in. Either my coaching client doesn’t have a primary love relationship (and would like one), or they have one but it has some challenges.

In the case of clients who already have relationships but are dissatisfied with them, they either want to work on the relationship or they don’t. Or, their partner does or doesn’t. Or a flip/flop and combo of these two occurs (with both partners going back and forth on their positions).

The Distancer and Pursuer Dance:
I’m not a therapist, I’m a coach. As such, I tend to focus on the future and what can be created (rather than on the past and what has already happened). However, because people often create from their pasts (or more accurately from their core beliefs formed from past events) I sometimes need to wade into the past to understand and help my client SHIFT-IT — or suggest my client co-engage a therapist to help us do it.

There is a distance-closeness dance that all people do in their relationships but for some couples the degree of it is much stronger due to their histories. One person tends to be the keener in the relationship and the other isn’t. One person turns towards or pursues and the other turns away from and withdraws. These roles can flip/flop throughout the stages of relationship too.

THE PURSUING ENERGY (LOVE ADDICT):
The Pursuer is the person in the relationship who pursues the other. Who often feels left out, below, or less power or value than the other. They want to catch the other person or have the other person pay attention to them because they have unmet needs from their pasts that they are unconsciously trying to get the other person to take care of. Instead of focusing on their own life and stability, they focus on the other person.

This person could be the one who pursued the relationship from the very start … or, they could have been reluctant (love avoidant or wary at first) then switched over to pursuer energy after the other person withdrew their energy. These people often come from childhoods where they experienced loneliness, neglect or even abuse often from a one-down or powerless position. Or witnessed their same sex parent acting in a pursuing way to their opposite sex withdrawing parent.

THE DISTANCING ENERGY (LOVE AVOIDANT):
The Distancer is the other side of the polarity. These people are the ones who avoid intimacy to varying degrees. They keep their partners at arms length often using work, children, hobbies, exercise, etc as exit strategies to keep unavailable. They often came from enmeshed backgrounds where they had a lot of responsibility as a young age or had to care for ineffective parents or siblings. Or, alternatively, from situations where they were overly controlled or hovered over.

To them, closeness is associated with burden or duty. Intimacy makes them uncomfortable but they also desire it as human’s need contact (which often drives them to pursue a partner then abandon them when true intimacy begins to sneak in — i.e. The 90 Day Wonders and beyond who disengage after the romantic stage of a relationship wanes).

Both of these types of people have intimacy issues – just in different ways. And its not uncommon for a person uncomfortable with intimacy to have both energies within themselves too — either ping ponging back and forth between the styles when they connect with different people … or even flip-flipping within the same relationship with the same person. They never learned how to be intimate in a healthy, sustained way (which is unfortunately not an uncommon occurrence in our world).

THE SOLUTION:
Often these two types of energies find each other and have codependent relationships. However there is an opportunity inherent in these relationships too … to bring both people’s issues into the light of day in order to make them conscious and to heal them. Not only improving their own quality of life but also the quality of life for people around them and for generations that may follow too.

The solution for The Pursuer is to stop chasing The Distancer and to re-engage with your own life. Get involved with activities you enjoy, see your friends, get engaged in your community, focus on your work goals, etc.

In short, get a life and stop expecting the other person to meet all of your needs – they can’t and they shouldn’t. And to do your own Inner Work on the wounds from the past that drive you to inappropriately pursue. All of these help you pull back your energy to a more appropriate intensity level, often allowing The Distancer to get in touch with their desire to come find you!

The solution for The Distancer is to get in touch with your own needs for connection and closeness. To understand through Inner Work what is behind your walls and to take steps of advancement towards your partner. To stop or lessen your various activities that block intimacy and learn how to negotiate space in a close relationship — developing more skillful boundary and communication skills along the way.

As you give your partner more of what they need, you get a partner who feels more secure and is more pleasant to be around, which makes you want to see them more! And the unconscious meaning that you apply to relationships begins to shift to a healthier place.

FURTHER RESOURCES:
Obviously this is a deep topic. And as a coach there is only so much I can write about in a short article. Hopefully I’ve managed to give you a little taste of this particular relationship challenge. If you have it (or have had it) you most likely recognize what I am talking about. If you want to learn more, here are a few recommended resources to help you do your inner healing work on the distancer/pursuer dance so you can increase your understanding and relate in more satisfying ways.

Facing Love Addiction, by Pia Melody. A classic author in the field of codependence.

Terry Real and Relational Life Institute

Keeping the Love You Find, by Harville Hendrix

For a related post, on Harville Hendrix’s work on the developmental wounds that people bring from their past into their relationships, click here.

The Gottman Relationship Institute via the research of Drs. John and Julie Gottman

©2012 Christina L. Merkley

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE?
You can, as long as you include this blurb and a functional link to my site:

Author’s Bio: Christina Merkley “The SHIFT-IT Coach” and creator of the SHIFT-IT System® is a Visioning and Strategic Planning Expert specializing in Visual Thinking and Law of Attraction techniques. Based in charming Victoria, British Columbia, Canada, she works deeply with individuals, partners and conscious businesses to define and manifest what they truly want. And, trains other helping professionals in her innovative ways of working. For more information visit: www.shift-it-coach.com

Relationship: Are You a Distancer or Pursuer? is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

This collaboration with Sheila & Marcus Gillette and THEO is a deep ‘inner work’ experience. With a focus on ‘soul integration’ and ‘orphan rescue’ work … an intimate opportunity to learn techniques to heal core issues. For the spiritual minded. Supportive, international community using the unique 2012 energy to heal and grow ourselves, our work, our relationships and our world.

More Info and Registration
*Starts Tuesday!

Magic Marker Advanced Mastermind
17 Weekly Webinars Plus 2-day In-Person Retreat. March 5 – July 2, 2012

I’m happy to announce a new intermediate-level program to support blossoming visual practitioners (scribes, facilitators and coaches). For people who have already received base visual training (from me or equivalent experience), and are keen to build the next phase of your visual career. This mastermind provides up close instruction and support to enhance your skills and biz (whether you are internal or external). Includes weekly drop-in calls, online forum for sharing, private mentoring with me, plus an in-person retreat. Group limited to 12 members.

Full Details and Application Process
* 6 Spots Left: Application Deadline Feb. 24th

Visual Coach Certification (2012 Cohort)
10-Weeks Online: April 10 – June 19 (Webinars, Tuesdays Noon-1:30 pm Pacific)

Become a Certified Visual Coach®. For leading-edge coaches, counselors and therapists from around the globe. Add the power and innovation of Visual Coaching to your own practice. Includes advanced visual coaching techniques, use of my SHIFT-IT System® (17 visual maps) with your clientele, instruction in the ‘template-izing’ of your own content into visual tools, plus marketing and biz development mentoring. Apply now to secure your place.

Full Details and Application Process
* 2 Pre-requisites Required

Fundamentals of Interactive-Visuals
May 3-5, 2012 in beautiful Victoria, British Columbia, Canada

Over 87% of your facilitation, coaching, training and consulting clients are visual thinkers – learn powerful visual skills to boost the effectiveness of how you work with them. This in-person, professional skills training thoroughly covers custom chart work, visual scribing, visual facilitation and visual coaching (the four main applications of working visually with groups and individuals) so you can add these powerful tools to your own consulting, facilitation, coaching and training offerings.

Register Now
Just 7 spots left! Early Bird until March 2.
*Note: Pre-requisite for Visual Coach Certification.

Events Calendar is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

So far applicants are from U.S., Canada and U.K. with a myriad of visual interests.

They appreciate that Interactive-Visuals is a unique, niche skill that is challenging to get expert mentoring and support in (especially for practitioners who have progressed beyond the beginning basics).

Several have put forth their applications to join the Mastermind in order to increase their proficiency in Visual Scribing and Visual Facilitation (build icon repertoire, add more originality and movement/energy/flow, enhance formatting techniques and take more ‘risks’ at the wall rather than play it safe).

A couple are Visual Coaches (one already Certified and another about to begin) who love using Interactive-Visuals techniques and desire a supportive and informed community to add to their skills and build their practices.

Others have unique intellectual property (based on years of working in their own niches) … that they want to develop their own Signature Visual Systems for (like what I have done with my SHIFT-IT Visual Coaching System®).

All in all I’m delighted with the quality and blend of Visual Practitioners who are applying and am REALLY EXCITED about the rocket fuel this group is shaping up to be.

There is nothing like a Mastermind to get us focused and in the energy of what we desire (in this case … fun, excellence and growth in the visual way of working).  Plus this is SUCH a unique offering — I’ve done wonderful masterminds before but not one that specifically brings Visual Practitioners together for their next round of growth.

It’s going to be supremely productive, results-oriented and FUN.

MORE DETAILS:

THE MAGIC MARKER MASTERMIND
4-Month Intensive for Visual Practitioners
March 5 – July 2, 2012 (weekly webinars plus 2 day retreat)
6 spots left – deadline to apply is Feb. 24th

You can find all the details, including info on the online application process here: http://www.visualcoaches.com/training/magic-marker-mastermind/

Beautiful Victoria, British Columbia, Canada

Get connected with your visual tribe!

Looking forward to seeing whom those last seats belong to and our cohort fully revealing itself. If you are feeling called, listen to that softly whispering (or loudly shouting) voice inside and get your application in now! Remember, this experience is for Visual Practitioners who already have their base training (either my Fundamentals of Interactive-Visuals or approved equivalency). It’s an intermediate offering, not for total beginners. I look forward to your application interview and reviewing your goals, intentions and visual examples. And having you join us for a power packed four months!

Yours in visual expansion,

Christina Merkley
The SHIFT-IT Coach
& Interactive-Visuals Mentor

P.S. Interested in Interactive-Visuals (visual scribing, visual facilitation or visual coaching) but don’t have basic training yet? There are 7 spots left in my upcoming May 3-5 training (the only public in-person training I offer this year). Early bird still in effect. Or, check out my private or in-house offerings.

P.P.S. Shy about working in a group? Would rather get individual attention? Can’t travel? See private tele-coaching for returning clients (some availability for 2012).

[Magic Marker Mastermind] 6 Visual Practitioners to Go … Are You One? is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

The topic for the episode was “THRIVE IN THE TIME OF AWAKENING” … the title of our upcoming collaborative series that begins Tuesday, Feb. 21st.

On the show we explained what the new expanded series is about, what THEO’s Soul Integration Process is … and how Visual Coaching helps you ground THEO’s big picture perspective into your own individual life.

We also discussed how learning to master your emotional triggers (via Soul Integration) changes your core beliefs and hence your vibrational set point … enabling you to attract more of what you do want and less of what you don’t!

To include you in dialogue, here is a link to the show — loaded with useful guidance from THEO on how to thrive during the accelerated shifts that are happening:

THEO MP3 Recording

[Note: The above link should instantly open in your computer's audio program. If it doesn't, cut and paste this link into your browser] www.asktheo.com/download.php?f=asktheoRADIO02072012.mp3

Christina with Sheila & Marcus Gillette

If you have been around my community for a while – you know that THEO is a source of information that I have repeatedly used over the years to help me create my own soul-directed life.

I regularly recommend them to clients — most recently bringing Sheila and Marcus into my Biz and Life Accelerator to assist with the Inner Work portion of that dynamic program.

Now we are uniting forces to an even greater extent in our upcoming THRIVE IN THE  TIME OF AWAKENING webinar series.  The Time of Awakening that THEO has predicted for 40 years is upon us.  The acceleration is occurring – right now!  It’s the perfect time to go for what you truly want in life and orient your life according.

This unique learning community begins next week on Tuesday, Feb. 21 and runs for 12 consecutive weeks (all webinars recorded).  A special opportunity to connect directly with THEO, your cohort mates from around the globe, and Marcus, Sheila and myself — to help you gracefully handle these times of change.


More Info and Online Registration:
Just 12 spots left!
http://www.asktheo.com/thrive2012

Enjoy the audio gift from THEO’s radio show. And for those who are a vibrational match, I look forward to you joining us for the expanded THRIVE IN THE TIME OF AWAKENING series. It’s going to be a fascinating co-created experience!

Yours in Thriving,

P.S.
Spots are limited and down to just 12 at time of writing. Act fast to avoid missing this one-of-a-kind experience.

P.P.S.
Not into the meta-physical / inner growth side of my work? More into the Interactive-Visuals? No problem, for information on upcoming Interactive-Visuals programs, including Fundamentals of Interactive-Visuals and The Magic Marker Mastermind, click here.

[Thrive in Time of Awakening] MP3 Recording from Ask THEO Radio Show is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

This season I have created two unique PROCESS CONTAINERS … intelligent, efficient and safe programs to do your professional and personal growth in.

They are …

1. THE MAGIC MARKER MASTERMIND (for visual practitioners ready to successfully up-level the use of Interactive-Visuals in your own work);

1. THRIVE IN THE TIME OF AWAKENING (a co-offering with THEO and Sheila & Marcus Gillette that teaches you how to identify and heal negative core beliefs and internal fragmentation);

Both these programs are filling now with start dates in February and early March. To help you determine if either (or both) of these programs are a match to your unique needs … see below for further details.

THE MAGIC MARKER MASTERMIND
4-Month Incubator for Visual Practitioners
March 5 – July 2, 2012 (weekly webinars plus 2 day retreat)
7 spots left – deadline to apply is Feb. 24th

Interest in the visual way of working is spreading like wild fire!!! You are a consultant, educator, facilitator, coach, visual scribe or other process professional. You have already received your base Interactive-Visual skills (from me or another recognized instructor in the field) and are keen for more. You love the visual way of working and are committed to increasing your skills, comfort, proficiency and success … either internally in an organization or via an independent part or full-time practice. This Mastermind of like-minded professionals gets you there – in record time … and in great company!

Beautiful Victoria, British Columbia, Canada

Boost your skills, increase your range, up your confidence … manifest the next rung of your visual ladder. This one-of-a-kind experience gives you the expert mentorship, guidance and support you need to Become Your Next ‘Visual’ Self.

Includes weekly mastermind sessions (all recorded), forum for visual uploads, private coaching, plus in-person finale retreat in beautiful Victoria, British Columbia, Canada (visually facilitated of course!).

 
Full Details and Online Application Process:
Limited to Just 12 Participants
http://www.visualcoaches.com/training/magic-marker-mastermind/

THRIVE IN THE TIME OF AWAKENING
Soul Integration Primer with THEO
Feb. 21 – May 8, 2012 (weekly webinars)

Feel an acceleration happening? Antsy to manifest your authentic self? Barriers, blocks and negativity keeping you from getting what you really, really want?

A hallmark of emotional mastery … this one-of-a-kind offering pairs the big picture perspective of trusted non-physical intelligence (THEO) with practical down to earth visual coaching. THEO delivers precise, tailored info on your Soul’s Journey … Sheila, Marcus and I funnel that info into grounded processes that propel you forward. For the meta-physically minded, includes segments on meditation, 2012 energetics, health, relationships, abundance, relationships, connecting with your guides … and deep inner work called “Soul Integration”. Includes specialty meditations plus Map Pack of visual inner work tools. Just 17 of 45 spots now left.

For More Info And Online Registration:
http://www.asktheo.com/thrive2012

Both of these programs are unique and one-of-kind … as are the folks who are attracted to them. It gives me sincere pleasure to offer them as part of my own Soul-Directed path. Yes, you can have a life that works … that honors ALL the parts of yourself. Join us this special season to SHIFT your life too!

Yours in visual expansion,

Christina Merkley
The SHIFT-IT Coach
& Interactive-Visuals Mentor

P.S. Interested in Interactive-Visuals (graphic recording, graphic facilitation or graphic coaching) but don’t have basic training yet? There are still 7 spots left in my upcoming May 3-5 training (the only public in-person training I offer this year).

P.P.S. Ready to SHIFT but the group offerings aren’t a fit? No problem, I also offer private coaching by phone and in-person. Check out options here. Some appointments in 2012 still available.

Two Process Containers to Help You SHIFT … Now! is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

FYI, announcing a new Interactive-Visuals offering … for Visual Practitioners seeking intermediate level support: The Magic Marker Mastermind.

This Mastermind is for prior students of mine who have already received foundational interactive-visuals training … or others who have equivalent experience through other means. Who are ready to “rocket up” to the next level of your visual existence. It is open to all manner of Visual Practitioners (visual scribes / recorders, visual facilitators and visual coaches).

Limited to just 12 people, by being in The Magic Marker Mastermind you will:

• Improve the quality of your interactive-visual skills (take your visual skills to your next level via tailored feedback and suggestions);

• Increase your confidence and pride in your own unique style and brand in the visual field (however you want to apply your skills and talents);

• Improve your ability to communicate the benefits of your visual services in a successful manner (whether you are internal in an organization, an independent, or building your visual craft on the side);

• Increase your client reach and volumes (learn ways to more fully connect with your market to increase your prosperity);

• Build a foundation of support for yourself and your visual dream with like-minded people from across the globe who deeply get you and want you to succeed (be seen, understood and supported);

• Learn how to come from a place of positive expectation, appreciation and abundance rather than procrastination, negativity and scarcity (what you create is directly linked to how you habitually feel and act).

The Mastermind includes 4 months of weekly online huddles (complete with private forum to share visual work), mp3 recordings (in case you miss a huddle or want to re-listen), 3 private coaching sessions with me, plus a 2 day finale retreat in beautiful Victoria, British Columbia in June — visually facilitated of course!

Entrance into The Magic Marker Mastermind is via application on a first-come, first considered basis. Spots are limited to just 12 people (four of which have already been nabbed!).

Your Mentor:

Christina Merkley
Interactive-Visuals Mentor
& The SHIFT-IT Coach

As a pioneering ‘visual coach’, I facilitate powerful awakening in individuals, partners and conscious businesses and am an internationally recognized coach of coaches.

Known for my innovative visual methods and progressive mindset, my work juxtaposes my childhood love of doodling and drawing with a fascinating background in organizational and personal growth.

With a Masters Degree in Organizational Development & Transformation (ODT), I began my career in the San Francisco Bay area traveling extensively throughout North America and Europe (first as an employee of The Grove Consultants International (pioneering Group Graphics firm led by David Sibbet) … then via my own independent practices).

I honed my skills in strategic planning and visioning working for such notable clients as Hewlett-Packard, eBay, Stanford University, British Broadcast Corp (BBC), The Institute for the Future and The Gordon and Betty Moore Foundation, American Institute of CPAs, eBay, etc.

Concurrent to corporate consulting I experienced a quickening of my spiritual path in the aftermath of the Sept. 11th tragedy (being scheduled to be in New York that fated day but rescheduled due to a synchronistic event). I transformed my work to include integration of the visual methodology with coaching and spirituality – returning to my lovely hometown of Victoria, British Columbia, Canada in 2003 and creating SHIFT-IT Coach, Inc.

Inspirationally received, my SHIFT-IT System® (comprised of 17 visual coaching tools) helps you discover and align with what you really want in work and life. Through private coaching, mastermind groups and my popular Certified Visual Coach® and Interactive-Visuals programs I mentor scribes, facilitators, coaches, therapists and consultants from around the world on how to use visual thinking methods with their own clients.

Full Details and Application Process:
I love facilitating these kinds of specialized, intensive experiences … as participant results are so gratifying and exciting (I’m still hearing back from members of last year’s Accelerator with their ripple effects).  I can just FEEL the energy of this Magic Marker experience building as this Mastermind forms and our special cohort comes together.

Should you feel this is the right experience for you … to assist you on your Visual Journey … I look forward to receiving your application now!

Full details and how to apply are here:
http://www.visualcoaches.com/training/magic-marker-mastermind/

Applications received on first come, first considered basis.  Deadline to apply is Feb. 24th … given the uniqueness of this program and the limited seats it will most likely fill before the deadline, so apply ASAP to secure your spot!

Yours in Visual Expansion,

Christina Merkley
Interactive-Visuals Mentor
& The SHIFT-IT Coach

P.S. For full details including dates, who’s a fit (and who’s not), how to demonstrate your experience, and how to apply … see  www.visualcoaches.com/training/magic-marker-mastermind/

P.P.S.  Don’t have beginning training yet?  FYI, there are still spots left for my upcoming Fundamentals of Interactive-Visuals workshop happening May 3-5 in beautiful Victoria, British Columbia, Canada.  And, I also do private trainings for individuals and groups who desire individualized attention, see  www.visualcoaches.com/training/

[Magic Marker Mastermind] Advanced Support for Visual Practitioners is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

Every year the appreciation of and interest in Interactive-Visuals grows … whether its via its use in scribing, facilitation, coaching … or other processes. I am so LOVING my younger self who made the decision many moons ago to pursue her passion! As not only did I get turned onto a methodology that brings me great satisfaction but now I get to turn on others from around the world to this WONDERFUL way to work too.

Given the number of inquiries my team and I are fielding, I thought it was timely to write an article on “How to Effectively Select a Visual Practitioner”. Whether you are looking for a Visual Scribe to take graphic notes during a keynote talk or dialogue. Or, a full-on Visual Facilitator to guide your group or organization through visual thinking. Or a Visual Coach to aid in personal strategic planning. Plus, writing this article helps me too — so I don’t have to keep repeating the same things over and over again! Hope you find it of good use.

Yours in visual expansion,

Christina Merkley
The SHIFT-IT Coach
and Interactive-Visuals Mentor

A Note From Christina is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach

Heather Martinez
Graphic Designer / Visual Practitioner

“New to graphic recording, I have found that the work itself is quite profound both professionally and personally. After taking the Fundamentals of Interactive-Visuals, I took the opportunity to meet with Christina for a 1:1 coaching session. Her ability to listen and share the type of resources I needed to take my next steps has launched me into sharing new ideas at work and fulfill myself personally through further training in interactive graphics. I’m currently taking the SHIFT-IT Online Group and short of turning into a navel-gazer, I’m discovering my true essence, what motivates me, and how I can embrace my highest potential. I look forward to experiencing what the coming weeks will bring and how I can apply my “new found self” to my existing life in new ways.

Of all the healing modalities and techniques I have studied, Christina’s approach to her work is impeccable. We are fortunate that she shares her gift with the world.

Heather Martinez
Graphic Designer / Visual Practitioner
Colorado, U.S.A.

In Your Words is a post from: SHIFT-IT Coach