Volume 6, Issue 5 | March 19, 2010
www.shift-it-coach.com | [email protected]

TABLE OF CONTENTS

 

  1. A Note From Christina
  2. Events Calendar
  3. Article: When You Change and They Don’t Like It
  4. Recent Blog Entries
  5. More Links & Resources

A NOTE FROM CHRISTINA


Dear %$firstname$%,

Well, the season is SHIFTing here in beautiful Victoria, British Columbia. The early cherry trees has burst into bloom. It’s gonna be a snow of pink petals soon. Those little petals are really beautiful but quite the drag to get off your car when they are plastered on by a west coast rainfall. Makes me even more grateful for having my garage – won’t have to go through picking them off my paint this year!

It’s been a nice mellow couple of weeks with signs of spring all around. Was recently interviewed by Heather Gray for her upcoming ‘Laptop Lifestyle Summit’ … which got me thinking about just how much my lifestyle has changed over the years. From my days as a busy graphic facilitator traveling the globe (where it wasn’t unusual to be home only a few days a month) … to my life now where I’m home for weeks/months at a stretch --- working virtually with my clients by phone or web, or them coming here to Victoria.


Victoria’s Early Cherry Trees In Bloom

Can You Believe This Is a Hydro Box?!

Victoria’s a special kind of town, full of strange surprises in unlikely places. On the way to my gym I spied this decorated hydro box to the left. Who the heck is responsible for this stuff? That took some doing … how to make a regular ugly metal box attractive … and not only that … inspirational. Well done! I just had to take a shot - as it was not only artistic but the saying is perfect for SHIFT-IT … great words to live by!

Talking about SHIFT-IT … I’ve written this issue’s article about an unpleasant aspect that can happen for some of us when we make our SHIFT. It doesn’t happen for everyone and it varies in degree … but there can be a metamorphosis in some of your relationships when you make a big shift. Just some soothing thoughts and reassurance if you find this happening during your own SHIFT process.

See you next issue!

Christina Merkley,
The SHIFT-IT Coach

ChristinaMerk on:
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SHIFT-IT School (upcoming courses):


Laptop Lifestyle Freedom Summit
Online: March 23 – 26th
My friend and colleague, Heather Gray from Soul Filled Life, interviewed myself and 11 other successful, heart-centered entrepreneurs and asked us to share the details of our unique journeys as well as 3 tips or strategies to help YOU grow and move forward with your own laptop lifestyle.

My call airs Tuesday, March 23rd

Register Here for F.r.e.e. Series

Laptop Lifestyle Freedom Summit
Writing e-Zine at Beach Last Summer

FUNDAMENTALS OF INTERACTIVE-GRAPHICS

THE FUNDAMENTALS OF INTERACTIVE-GRAPHICS
May 20-22nd, Victoria, BC, Canada

3-Day Professional Skills Training for Up and Coming Graphic Recorders, Graphic Facilitators & Graphic Coaches. Just 10 Spots Left!

Add the power of working visually to your own consulting, facilitation or coaching practice!  Strategically build your foundational skills – no matter where on the visual spectrum you want to play.  Apprentice-type training draws keen attendees from across the globe (our graphic tribe)  Learn easy, doable tricks to immediately improve the efficiency and range of your work with groups and/or individuals.  Treat yourself to this extremely productive (and fun) skills building workshop in a beautiful location.  No previous art experience necessary. Click Here for Full Details and Easy Online Registration

FUNDAMENTALS OF INTERACTIVE-GRAPHICS

SHIFT-IT COACH CERTIFICATION PROGRAM (first ever!)

Online Training: Tuesdays, April 20 – June 22nd (10-11:30 am Pacific)
Join the 28 Pioneers Already Registered from Across the Globe!

Become a Certified SHIFT-IT Coach. Training & Individual License in my Custom SHIFT-IT System® and 17 Merkley Maps®

One of the ways that I personally have applied my fundamental visual skills is into the realm of Graphic Coaching (a new niche I’ve helped pioneer) and more specifically into my custom SHIFT-IT System® and suite of 17 visual maps.   After years of being asked – I am now teaching and licensing other helping professionals in my custom process and tools.  Import this client-pleasing, step-by-step, proven system easily into your own practice for instant visual suave and marketability.  Results in more range, options, confidence, clients, prosperity and FUN for you!  The Fundamentals of Interactive-Graphics course (see above) is a pre-requisite (or equivalent experience).  Special ‘Combo’ package of both trainings available until April 10th:  Full Details and Online Application Process

FEATURE ARTICLE: WHEN YOU CHANGE AND THEY DON'T LIKE IT


(Now Recorded!) To Listen to My Audio of This Article, Click Here)


You have a goal or a whole set of them. You figure out your Vision. You create and implement a plan. You deal with your own ‘Trouble at the Border’ issues … all those little (and sometimes big) internal and external gremlins along your path. And your New World and New Self begins to manifest right before your eyes.

Sounds great right?! It is!!! Congratulations! However some new manifesters are very surprised to learn that not everyone welcomes or supports their SHIFTs … sometimes the people who are used to you being a certain way can’t, won’t or are simply incapable of supporting the new you.

The Reality:
Change can be challenging. For you, it required strong focus, discipline, getting-in-the-vortex and taking or attracting aligned action.Step by step you made your SHIFT and now you are reaping the results. Unfortunately it can be a sad reality that sometimes when you successfully make a big SHIFT, some people around you can have a hard time with it and you.

When you change, it can trigger some of the people around you. Suddenly (or gradually) they don’t so much like being around you anymore. Perhaps you are now into things they aren’t, or you start to think, talk or act in a different way. Sometimes it’s nothing personal (really!) it’s just they feel uncomfortable around you now. Whatever attracted you to each other in the first place has changed. You are no longer a vibrational match. In fact, you are kind of repelling!

I Went Through This Stage Too:
This sort of thing happened to me on my SHIFT-IT journey too. I came back to Canada 7 years ago (my how time flies!) and hunkered down to manifest my Next Self. I wanted to use my well-honed visual and process skills in a new way --- with individuals, in a Law of Attraction based context, and using the Internet to connect with people of like interest from across the world. While I loved my graphic recording and graphic facilitation career, a decade of constant travel was enough for me … and I had other things that I wanted to express.

So I set about actualizing my dream by creating my SHIFT-IT Coaching practice (including my custom process & suite of visual tools) and changing my life in a myriad of ways (where I lived, the kind of work I did, who I hung out with, what I read, the kinds of thoughts I thought, the feelings I had on a regular basis, where I traveled, etc).

It didn’t happen right away … but slowly and surely there was a perceptible change in some of the people around me – actually that is how I was able to gauge that change was actually happening to me (it can be hard to notice on yourself). The energy from some of my friends, family and old colleagues took on a strange formality and politeness. And some snide comments started to make their way back to me through the grapevine.

It’s Ok, It Is Hard to Go Through:
At first I was really hurt by these reactions. I didn’t see or understand just how much I was changing and why people were reacting the way they were. I figured I was still the same person – so why were they treating me differently. I had worked hard. I knew I deserved what was coming to me. But I didn’t understand why some people were turning on me.

However, I came to know that I actually wasn’t the same person. I had changed. I had grown and developed and changed in some pretty significant ways. Frankly, it took me a while to really appreciate and own that and to have compassion for it. To accept that it was ok for me to be me (and them to be them) even if it meant that our relationship changed or fell away.

It’s All Normal:
Participating in several masterminds with other emerging entrepreneurs and being privy to the rapid rise of a few of my mentors and my own clients– I can tell you that this phenomenon is not an isolated experience. In fact, psychologically (depending on your temperament) this can be one of the more challenging issues that you may need to face as you make your SHIFT, or even allow yourself to entertain the thought of making one in the first place. In fact, this issue can act as major resistance for a lot of people in making their SHIFT – they are concerned about how the people around them will react and what their life will be like.

If your SHIFT is starting to manifest and you notice people acting strange or in hurtful ways … know that it is a normal stage that many of us Big SHIFTers go through. And … I’m not going to sugar coat it … it can and does hurt, sometimes A LOT. My mastermind buddies and I have all had ‘our crying in the bathroom’ experiences when people have been mean, nasty and critical at conferences, in emails, etc. In fact, that is why being in a mastermind with your peers (or those ahead of you) is so valuable --- you can share about stuff like this! And, I can reassure you that it softens over time. It does get easier to handle as you learn how to deal with and integrate it.

Your New Tribe Forms:
Part of what helps is that you begin to attract and mingle with a new set of people. Some of your old circle (hopefully most) will stick by you and joyously celebrate your SHIFT (and remain a valued part of your life). However, those that don’t like or approve of the new you will fall away, either gradually or abruptly. New people do show up to fill those holes left behind … at least eventually. I say eventually because sometimes there is a time lag as your physical world recalibrates around your new vibration and attracts like-vibe people to you. But they do come!

Crab in the Bucket Syndrome:
About a year ago I was so pleased to find a term I could attach to this condition, courtesy of two of my esteemed colleagues and clients --- Tereasa Golka and Denise Findlay of Chameleon Change Strategies.

Facilitators in First Nations change projects --- these two talented women often work in aboriginal communities where the legacy of widespread cultural trauma floods generations. In these circumstances it is sadly common for one person trying to make a change in their life to be pulled back by others in their community --- the proverbial ‘crab in the bucket’.

Certainly a powerful metaphor to say the least! And one that can be applied to many different situations – including the emerging entrepreneur scenario I’ve painted in this article.

FYI, Tereasa and Denise will be my guests on the April 24th edition of my f.r.e.e. Soothing Saturday Series. If you are resonating with the topic of today’s article … then be sure to catch this live call (or the recorded mp3 that will be distributed afterwards to all Soothing Saturday members).

Focus on What You DO Want:
Finally, in closing, let me remind you that the most powerful thing you can ever do (from a Law of Attraction perspective) is to put your focus on WHAT YOU DO WANT and off of what you don’t. Use the contrast of the unpleasantness of your experience with some people to help you define what you do prefer instead … then focus on that! The more you think about what you do want (and feel those warm feelings coursing through your system) the more your vibration emits a different frequency in the now … which in turn speeds up your manifestation process and attracts it to you quicker!

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© 2010 Christina L. Merkley

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE?
You can, as long as you include this blurb and a functional link to my site:

Christina Merkley, "The SHIFT-IT Coach" and creator of the SHIFT-IT System®, is a Visioning and Strategic Planning Expert specializing in Visual Thinking and Law of Attraction techniques. Based in charming Victoria, British Columbia, Canada, she works deeply with individuals, partners and conscious businesses to define and manifest what they truly want. And, trains other helping professionals in her innovative ways of working.  For more information visit: www.shift-it-coach.com

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ABOUT CHRISTINA MERKLEY

Christina Merkley
The SHIFT-IT Coach

Christina Merkley is The SHIFT-IT Coach. Creator of the SHIFT-IT System®, she guides individuals, partners and conscious companies in defining and getting what they really, really want.

A teacher of Law of Attraction, she is also an expert in visual meeting techniques, strategic planning and visioning: having worked for such notable companies as BBC, Readers Digest Funds, eBay and Stanford University. After a move from San Francisco, she now lives in charming Victoria, British Columbia, Canada - where she maintains a vibrant coaching, facilitation and training practice.

Full Bio

Copyright © 2004-2010 Christina L. Merkley. All rights reserved.
60 Dallas Road, Victoria, British Columbia, V8V 1A2, Canada
http://www.shift-it-coach.com