I’ve been doing a lot of visioning work lately — with corporate graphic facilitation clients, with drop-in coaching clients on the Monday night SHIFT-IT Central calls, and with applicants to my new Biz and Life Accelerator. During some of these experiences I have been reminded of a useful visioning and Law of Attraction rule — go as specific as it still feels good. In this article I’m going to explain what that means and give examples of how you can get this rule working for you.
When Being Specific Is Good:
Being specific in terms of your visioning work can helpful and good in some circumstances. People are often advised in visioning and strategic planning forums to be as specific as possible (quote specific dollar amounts, name geographic locations, put a ‘by when’ date that something is to happen by, etc.). And, in some cases specificity is the totally right way to go. These cases are when people are ready to go very specific and in doing so it makes them FEEL GOOD. They know what they want, they believe it is possible for them and they have very little in the way of resistance standing between them and their desired outcome. The things they have outlined don’t feel like a big deal, in fact, they just feel like the next logical step.
However, not all individuals or groups are ready to go specific and when they are guided to do so, they begin to FEEL REALLY BAD instead of good. Putting specifics around their desire makes them uncomfortable. They aren’t ready to be so specific. They have big doubts about whether the specific is the right way to go, can be accomplished in the date set out (if at all), and might even be uncertain in their right or ability to ask for it or want it. In these kinds of cases it’s best to back off on the specificity and go more general. The resistance is just too great and to continue to engage the resistance in such a direct way is folly … as INTERNAL ENERGY & FEELING is everything when it comes to successful manifestation.
So, what do I mean by specific and general? Let me give you a few examples from my coaching and consulting practice.
DO YOUR OUTER WORK:
Due to the amazing technological time that we live in – there are many new resources that we can use to accelerate our SHIFTs, particularly in the creation or enhancements of our jobs, practices, businesses or right livelihoods.
A new coaching client is in the midst of a huge transition. Her 20+ year marriage is dissolving, she has quit her job (which she’s done for almost as long) and wants to relocate to a new city. She thinks she knows the city that she wants to relocate to – however when she attempts to so some visualization work with herself in those surroundings she finds it slightly uncomfortable … like she’s forcing it to fit.
Instead of encouraging her to force something that doesn’t feel right yet, I suggest that she focus instead on the qualities or essence of her desired location in general, rather than a specific city or area. Give up trying to force something that isn’t ripe yet and instead let Law of Attraction do the sorting.
Comfortable, clean, beautiful, fresh, cozy, friendly and easily accessible (but not too accessible) to extended family are the general attributes that she comes up with. Her homework is to focus on these general qualities and feel herself having them rather than trying to force a specific name of a city. Through the Law of Attraction the specific city will eventually emerge and come into focus.
Another example where we see the problem of specificity rearing its uncomfortable head is in the area of relationships. One of my clients was in a relationship with a dashing, handsome and very busy man until he called an end to it due to his hectic schedule. She’s very attracted to him but is confused about what to do with her personal visioning. She’d like to envision a future with him but does not feel fully confident on the outcome or if it’s even appropriate to do visioning on someone who doesn’t seem to be that into her. Should she focus on him or on someone else?
This is another case where it’s best to be general rather than specific. While she likes this particular man she encounters a lot of her own resistance and disbelief when she attempts to do visioning on a relationship with him. Instead I coach her to not worry about the particular name or form that love comes in, but to rather focus on the general qualities and attributes she desires and feel herself being in a mutual, two-way relationship with them (the energy of the type of relationship she desires rather than on a specific person).
As she focuses on those qualities and elicits that energy in her system, then Law of Attraction will attract a man who emits those same particulars (like attracts like) … either in a changed situation in the attitude or circumstances of the man she was dating or through the form of another man who more naturally vibrates the essence of what she desires. Either way by focusing on the generalities of what she desires (rather than being wedded to the specifics having to come through a specific human form) she gets the essence of what she desires.
In my new business incubator The Biz and Life Accelerator, applicants have been telling me their desires in terms of accelerating their solo practices or entrepreneurial ventures. I have set this program in a very specific revenue range (50-300K). For some, these specific number elicits very little or no resistance as they are already comfortably earning at that level or are very attracted to be doing so – so they decisively apply to be in the program. For others, the specific numbers elicit varying degrees of reactions.
While I am not letting them off the hook in terms of the revenue expectations for being in the program … (it can be healthy sometimes to be forced into a relationship with a number until your resistance to it softens) I do soothe people by asking them to focus instead of how they want to FEEL about their business and revenues. Typical answers: relief, happy, secure, powerful, free, strong, satisfied, proud, empowered, on point, helping, expressing, flowing, engaging, connecting, serving, etc.
The point being that it’s not about the specific numbers per se, it’s really about the feeling state that the new level of business and revenues creates in their life – what it provides for them and the people they do business with – the numbers are just a tangible representation of those feelings.